This is for you, wherever you are...

So let me just say this out right.
My Life is a smouldering pile of pain,hurt,and disappointed hopes.. There's just too much shit . TOO.MUCH.SHIT. that I have seen and continue to see ... and i just cant take it any more.
and in all this I really could use a friend like you, especially when i know i just have to reach out and you'll be there in less than a minute,
but for reasons I wont repeat, we both know that aint happening.
I am broken, miserable,sad and lonely. I am in physical pain everday.
Largely because of what I see happening to marriages around me. They are black holes that just just suck the life out of you and eat you alive.
and how stupid would I be to push myself into one such black hole deliberately.
and I know you have hopes and you promise you'll be different, and I know you're different, but I'm sorry, try to understand where I'm standing, and at this point in time i'm just to broken up to even consider the idea of marriage to anyone much less fight for it,but you already know all that, so what's really my point?
My point is its so hard for me to have you at an arm's length and not being able to reach out for you..... I need to break away from you completely.
and like you said if two people are meant be, they find their way back to each other.
So Have Faith be strong and Let GO.
I am asking you to Let Me GO this time...  and I need to let You go..
like really let go, no strings attached.